Knowing

If you knew a friend was going to die in 24hrs from an unforseen accident, would you tell them?
If you knew a whole city would cease to exist in 6 months, would you tell it's citizens?
If you knew a world was about to crumble, would you warn them? Would they want to know?
Knowing is a curse. I've come to realize that lately. The emotional reality of what I know the future to be just hit home yesturday. I think I've been pretending I just thought I knew, based on rational analysis of facts.

I always wanted to be wrong.

But now I've accepted that I FEEL it. The real kicker of the situation is that I really CAN'T warn anybody. It wouldn't be fair to unload that on them, and they probably wouldn't be able to listen anyway. It just causes more grief. There is a reason some of us are panicking, and most aren't. It's simple. God only gives you what you can deal with.

Most people simply cannot bear to face the full emotional reality of what we are creating for ourselves. They would not make it. Their psyche would crumble. Better to allow them some happy delusions at the last, then cause them to live in unnecessary prolonged and helpless fear.

Bees are disappearing. Bats are dying. The oceans will be too acidic to support creatures at the bottom of the food chain by 2025. Our entire ecosystem is crashing. And that isn't even considering the geopolitical, financial, technological capacity we have to destroy ourselves. We are in the middle of one of the largest extinction events in planetary HISTORY.

This is not good news people.

We are phucked six ways to sunday. We are very likely going extinct as we speak. It's such a shame we had to take so many beautiful things with us.

But hell, there's not much I can do about it. I've thought about this for a while, and the best I can do is be with the people I love most, and pray.

I've had a good life. I've felt joy and sorrow. I have loved the ocean like a Mother. I've had the good fortune to experience many people and places. I've known much beauty and love. I don't regret a moment of my experiences here. Even the most painful have had something to teach me.

A very few times in my life, when I have felt most lost, I reach out and ask for help. It is of great comfort to me that I am always Answered. I prayed a lot yesturday.
And today I was answered.
The answer isn't always what you like to hear. Very often it flies in the face of anything logical. But I've tried logical. I've tried doing what we are "supposed" to do. Logic has nothing to do with god. The grand plan by it's very nature defies our logic. I guess that's why they call it faith.
Things will change fast now. I've been kicked into high gear. I had grand plans for my McVansion ;) but I need to get out FAST. One month, and I put this town to my rudder, and ne'er look back.